Who Is This Child? (a.k.a. He Must Get This From His Father)

HELP.

Roscoe is losing his mind (or is that just me?).  He throws his food off the table and then bawls hysterically that he no longer has it.  He begs for milk or water or whatever and then purposely pours the entire cup on the table/floor/himself.  Then bawls for whatever he just poured out.  I say no.  He has a tantrum.  He begs to wear his crocs.  Puts them on.  Takes them off and refuses to put them back on (we had to grocery shop between my conference call and his nap time).  I let him pick other shoes to wear.  He does.  I put them on.  He tries to put the crocs over top the Nike high-tops and bawls when that doesn't work out.  I take off the high-tops and put on his crocs.  He has a tantrum.  He cries to be picked up.  I pick him up.  He hits my face and pinches my eyes.  I throw him out the window put him down.  He bawls.

This is a glimpse into what life is like when I am with Roscoe.  Note that he does not act out like this with his nanny, only does occasionally with Ray and rarely does with me if other people are around.  But when it is just the two of us I swear he is trying to hurt me/test me/punish me.  He also is very clingy with me, which is a first for him in his short life.  I am try to be logical and not lose it completely, so I channel the insights I read in Emotional Life of The Toddler.  I realize he is trying to assert his independence, but is torn by his need for his mama.  I understand that this is much worse after I leave him for an extended period of time (i.e. go to work) so he is obviously not happy about that.  I am pretty uncomfortable myself these days and my stores of patience are far from unlimited.  I just don't really know what to do about it and I am praying (HARD) that this is just a phase that will (PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE) pass before we have a needy, crying newborn in the house (that PLEASE GOD is not colicky).  PLEASE.

On a lighter and more comical note (for your benefit because it did not feel comical at the time), I managed to lock myself out of the house when trying to leave for the grocery store.  And, of course, my car keys were on the same keychain inside the house.  Good thing (ha!) I am so fastidious about locking up every single door when leaving the house...  I was able to open an unlocked window and crawl through.  After lifting Roscoe in first.  Did I mention I am 7 months pregnant and have a hard time getting out of bed, let alone climbing through a window?  I am positive I looked as ridiculous as you are imagining.